Friday, August 22, 2008

Lance Armstrong Loves Water

Bicycling sensation, cancer survivor and advocate, notorious ladee luver and Matthew McConoughhey BFF Lance Armstrong recently moved into an 8,000 square foot newly built Spanish colonial style house outside of Austin, TX where he lives with surrounds by lots of ebonized wood, leather floors, contemporary art and, somewhat surprisingly, a lot of pinky-mauve color accents.

Outdoor amenities include sky high cypress trees framing long allées, covered patios to escape from the scorching Texas sunshine, a heated swimming pool with an adjacent cabana and acres of of exuberantly green and rolling lawns that surely helped to give Mister Armstrong the recent and dubious distinction of being the largest private residential water user in the city of Austin.

According to an article in the Austin American-Statesman, Mister Armstrong's 3-acre estate used 222,900 gallons of water in the month of June, which is about 26 times the amount the average Austin household uses in a single month. Using our bejeweled abacus to run those numbers another way, Your Mama figures that in just one single month Mister Armstrong used more than twice the amount of water a typical house in Austin uses in an entire year. An entire damn year!

Mister Austin's water bill for the month of June, according to the Austin Water Utility, was a high and hefty $1,612 and twenty three cents. That may be pennies and pocket change to a man as wealthy as Mister Armstrong, but it's probably more than the average American takes home in a single month.

To his credit, upon learning of his water wasting, Mister Armstrong was conciliatory and declared that he has, "no interest in being the top water user in Austin, Texas" and vowed to fix the problem. Your Mama hopes in our water conserving heart that the hot bodied pedal pumper is trucking in some giant rain water collection devices and learning to live with a lawn that's a little less green.

According to a recent article in the always glittering, glowing and fawning Architectural Digest (that is loaded with juicy photos), Mister Armstrong also has homes in Spain, New York, a Texas ranch and a Bahamian hideaway.

Photo: Jay Janner for Austin American-Statesman

17 comments:

StPaulSnowman said...

I don't know how old this property is but at this point it looks like a smooth computerized architectural rendering of a modern "estate". With time, and a whole lot of water, it may mature into something that is truly beautiful. The maturation of the landscaping would soften, or cover up, the uninteresting and numerous buildings. I guess I was pretty naive about the kind of wealth this guy had developed.

Anonymous said...

Where did that tricycle rider get the dough for all those homes?

I don't see him in any major ad campaigns.

Anonymous said...

His garage is bigger than my friggin house! And probably my entire lot.

Sigh.

Anonymous said...

This story is so old. It was in the NY Times last week.

Anonymous said...

This story is so old. It was in the NY Times last week.

Anonymous said...

Has it ever occurred to anyone else that Lance Armstrong is so dominant in the sport of bicycle racing because his lack of testicles gives him an unfair advantage, so to speak, over other male riders? I mean, I commend the guy for surviving cancer and all, don't get me wrong, but that thought is always in the back of my mind whenever I see him win something...the men out there will probably understand why this thought comes to me more than the women might, LOL...;-)

Anonymous said...

This interior is SHITEOUS, and looks like some grand Hyatt convention center in Arizona.

The kitchen was nice though.

Anonymous said...

Would love to know the percentage of his imcome that is derived from for-profit, vs. not-for-profit endeavors. Not accusing and certainly not assuming, but I pray his revenue is not capitalizing on the for-profit directed toward tragic and life-threatening conditions.

Attempted due diligence of his revenue stream. It is a very murky path to discern.

Anonymous said...

He lets Matthew McConnohey smoke cigarettes around him in the home theatre...how Kool is that?

Anonymous said...

Why does a single-nutted single man need a house this big? PUH-LEEZ!!!

Jimmy said...

Well, all you Nattering Nabobs of Negativism, Lance has earned every buck he has, and he has lots and lots of them.

If you don't think so then ride the hills and mountains of France for 2,200 or so miles in less than 30 days at full speed. Then do it seven years in a row and each year, beat the greatest athletes in the world do it.

Anonymous said...

Look what steroids paid for!

Anonymous said...

You'd think he'd be a bit more green.

Anonymous said...

I love Austin! :)

chris said...

I too marvel, or rather wonder, at where his money comes from. I suppose he has done a few ad campaigns, but he didn't win zillions of Euros in prizes for the Tour de France, did he? I'd sure like to know where a mere bicycle rider gets his hands on this kind of money.

Anonymous said...

A large chunk of it was bonus money, paid out for consecutive tours won via a team paid for insurance policy betting on the odds against it.

Plus spokesperson money from American Century Investments, Bristol Meyers Squibb...his own clothing line, a division of Nike, 10//2...and an alleged partial ownership of the 1 billion + juggernaut, Trek Bicycles, that he helped place on the international map...

rick is! said...

he doesn't do endorsements??? in his racing prime, he was one of the highest paid athletes (salary + bonus + ensorsements) in the entire world. All sports included. I believe that one year he was #2 behind Tiger Woods. He's got lots of jing.